not all those who wander are lost

we watched this during fhe yesterday.

i was immediately touched by it;

tears were rolling down my cheeks, as i know

with every fiber in my being

that i know the calm feeling russell m. nelson

is talking about.

a couple weeks ago,

i had a slightly similar near-death experience.

i was riding my family's vespa home from the sportsmall.

it was dark out,

& difficult to see on the dimly lit streets.

as i was riding down the far right lane,

i noticed a car ahead,

on a street perpendicular to mine,

on my right side.

this car attempted to execute a right hand turn,

as i was riding in front of them.

at a speed of 45mph,

i had to quickly & severely swerve

 in order to not be hit & scattered across the road.

i continued to drive home in a state of awe.

i thought i should be mad at the person driving that car,

who didn't see me,

& nearly killed me,

but i wasn't.

not at all.

in fact,

i actually felt sorry for them.

i couldn't imagine how awful they must have felt

after seeing me swerve past their front bumper.

i felt calm as i drove home.

more calm than i had felt in a long time.

my heart wasn't racing,

my thoughts weren't chasing after regrets.

for one of the first times in my life,

i had this thought that,

"if i had just died, tonight, i would be ok.

my life will have been a simple & humble triumph."

i have repented of my past sins.

i have lived in honest & earnest attempt to be near

my father in heaven.

i am filled with his love & peace.

i was calm.

i am calm,
for i know that

everything will be ok.

more than love

of all the poets & poems out there,

this is one of my most favorite

written by one of my favorites.

"annabel lee"  by: edgar allan poe

it was many & many a year ago,

in a kingdom by the sea,

that a maiden there lived whom you may know

by the name of annabel lee;

& this maiden she lived with no other thought

than to love & be loved by me.

i was a child & she was a child,

in this kingdom by the sea;

but we loved with a love that was more than love-

i & my annabel lee.

with a love that the winged seraphs of heaven

coveted her & me.

& this was the reason that, long ago,

in this kingdom by the sea,

a wind blew out of a cloud, chilling

my beautiful annabel lee;

so that her highborn kinsman came

& bore her away from me,

to shut her up in a sepulchre

in this kingdom by the sea.

the angels, not half so happy in heaven,

went envying her & me-

yes!- that was the reason (as all men know,

in this kingdom by the sea.)

that the wind came out of the cloud by night,

chilling & killing my annabel lee.

but our love it was stronger by far than the love

of those who were older than we-

of many far wiser than we-

& neither the angels in heaven above,

nor the demons down under the sea,

can ever dissever my soul from the soul

of the beautiful annabel lee.

for the moon never beams without bringing me dreams

of the beautiful annabel lee;

& the stars never rise but i feel the bright eyes

of the beautiful annabel lee;

& so, all the night-tide, i lie down by the side 

of my darling- my darling- my life & my bride,

in the sepulchre there by the sea,

in her tomb by the sounding sea.

bring me your love tonight

city & colour

11/11/11

was the best concert i have ever been to.

(i'm not exaggerating.)

the music,

the company,

the night;

it was fantastic.

i once had a friend tell me he believes there is nothing better

than dancing with a cute girl while listening to good music.

now, i have to agree with him

(naturally replacing 'cute girl' with 'handsome boy', of course).

swaying & singing along to songs like

made me feel the best i have felt in a long time.

it was perfect.

snowfall kind of love

the first snowfall always puts me in a good mood;

a frank sinatra mood.

this is my favorite sinatra song.

i want it to be played at my wedding one day.

it's just so classy.

& that's what snowfall,

fresh & clean from the sky,

reminds me of.

i love warm winter clothes:

boots

tights

scarves

gloves

beanies

& jackets.

when i think of winter's first snowfall,

i picture an old-fashioned scene.

a boy & a girl are walking together,

arm in arm, through the snowy streets 

into a warm, cozy, dimly lit restaurant

where they enjoy a lovely meal at a quaint table for two,

right next to the frosty window.

& frank sinatra has to be playing in the background.

it just fits.

romantic.

i believe in christ

i believe in christ;

he stands supreme.

from him i'll gain my fondest dream;

& while i strive through grief & pain,

his voice is heard: "ye shall obtain."

long time comin'

forever ago i promised i'd be making a video of

my friends' st. george trip.

well, here it is.

enjoy!

red hunting caps

the human brain is an interesting thing.
with each moment of time, significant or not, a memory is created.  this memory is noted by the emotions stirred within our hearts, glimpses of detail caught by our eyes, & thoughts passing through at that time.  but time has a mysterious way of clouding the links to these memories.  the more time that goes by; the foggier the link.  the memory still exists, but we somehow find ourselves disconnected.  while we are able to recall even the most minute of details in such memories, we no longer feel the emotions that were attached & often rediscovered when called upon at an earlier, less foggy, time.  we can only remember feeling a certain way.

i think this is a tragically beautiful blessing.

it makes moments, like these, possible for reexamination at a later time.

it was a night like any other.  the street was dimly lit by lamp posts & yellow stars, spotted along its borders.  the neighbors had all gone to bed, & little children fast asleep needed quiet.  summer was drawing near its end, & the first chapter of highschool was about to begin.
unaware & unprepared for what the future held in store for their relationship, an innocent girl in love was being walked home by a boy.  crickets & laughter filled the air, as he wrapped his arm around her shoulder, protecting her from the superstitiously dark lamp post.  blush flooded her face as he whispered words of vigilant endearment in her ear.
the surrounding trees blanketed their love in blissful secrecy as they arrived in her backyard, but it was the cold, emerald-colored grass that had a peculiar way of bringing the two closer.  whether by causing their toes to find their way to each other in search of lingering summer heat, or by tickling her neck until he places his arm underneath it in a chivalrous attempt to provide her with comfort;  the grass knew how to bring them together.
as he kissed her goodnight, she silently swore she could marry him someday.
she walked inside, having loved relentlessly & blissfully.
he walked away, his head hung heavy with protective fear.

all hallows' eve

this halloween was a blast!
i went to several parties
 in several different costumes.

party #1:  hallow-funka-ween
costume:  pirate

party #2:  random house party
costume:  pirate (with 5 minutes notice, courtesy of l. walker's brother)

party #3:  avenue house party
costume:  the holidays
meg was valentine's day
laci was st. patrick's day
lindsay s. was mother's day
kalli was the 4th of july
sara was pioneer day
amber was halloween
i was thanksgiving
lindsay w. was christmas
& carson was just a scary guy

party #4:  the institute party
costume:  snow white & the 7 dwarfs

i was grumpy

megan was doc

lindsay s. was sneezy

sara was sleepy

kalli was dopey

laci was happy

emma was bashful

& lindsay w. was snow white!

we were seriously the hit costumes of this party.

at least 10 people asked to take picture of/with us.

definitely a halloween to remember!

edging closer