the roses are in my hand

i discovered a new side of beauty to this song last week

& have been mauling over how to express to you what it means to me since then.

dreaming with a broken heart  by: john mayer

when you're dreaming with a broken heart

the waking up is the hardest part.

you roll out of bed, & down on your knees,

& for a moment you can hardly breathe.

wondering, was she really here?

is she standing in my room?

no, she's not.

'cause she's gone, gone, gone, gone, gone.

when you're dreaming with a broken heart

the giving up is the hardest part.

she takes you in with her crying eyes

then, all at once, you have to say goodbye.

wondering, could you stay, my love?

will you wake up by my side?

no, she can't.

'cause she's gone, gone, gone, gone, gone.

now do i have to fall asleep with roses in my hand?

do i have to fall asleep with roses in my hand?

do i have to fall asleep with roses in my hand?

do i have to fall asleep with roses in my, roses in my hand?

would you get them if i did?

no, you won't.

'cause you're gone, gone, gone, gone, gone.

when you're dreaming with a broken heart

the waking up is the hardest part.

many people look at this song as a break-up song,  as do i.

however, i think it also proves worthy of being representative of any kind of lost love.

whether that's due to death, distance, broken relationships, or spiritual heartbreak.

for simplicity's sake though,

i want to talk about how this song applies to my current single status.

what originally caught my attention was the ever-romantic lyrics,

"& for a moment you can hardly breathe,

wondering, was she really here?"

it's that feeling of being so humbled by a lost love,

you are amazed that it could ever have existed.
that that person could ever have stood in your room;

breathtaking.
& then there's:

"do i have to fall asleep with roses in my, roses in my hand?

would you get them if i did?

no, you won't.

'cause you're gone, gone, gone, gone, gone."

i have felt this way not just in relationships, but in friendships as well.

wanting so desperately to give everything you have to someone,

but realizing you can't because they're "gone".

roses generally symbolize love,

but they can also represent things that are sweet, lovely, or beautiful.

the roses i wish i could give
are the words i never said.

the things i always felt,
but never expressed in full.

& i dream of giving them, not necessarily to bring someone back,

rather, to simply let them know how it was for me.

there's also a part of me that just loves to make people happy.

i want to tell someone how much i admire, adore, appreciate, & love them,

but in waking up, i realize i can't.

they're not mine to admire, adore, appreciate, or love anymore.

they're gone.

there's so much more to this song than i can express in this simple blog post.

i love it so much,

that in just writing out what it means to me--

i get that hard lump that hurts caught in the middle of my throat.

so just listen & feel.
watch & enjoy.