rodya, i admit you're an intelligent chap, but you are a fool! (143)

existentialism!!
one of my most favorite topics in discussing philosophy or literature.

right now in my russian lit. class we are reading crime & punishment by fyodor dostoevsky.  & again i am being reminded why i love this book.  after today's discussion, i feel like running, stopping someone, jumping up & down, & spouting out all these thoughts i have coursing through my head until i & drop, wheezing: gasping for breath.

the main thought is, "existentialism: where do we draw the line?"

"...'or renounce life altogether!' he exclaimed suddenly, as if inspired, 'submit obediently, once for all, to destiny, as it is, & stifle everything within oneself, renouncing every right to act, to live, or to love!'

suddenly marmeladov's question of the previous day came back to him: 'do you understand, my dear sir, do you understand what it means to have nowhere left to turn to?  for every man must needs have somewhere to turn to'..." (38)

when does killing for the greater good become massacre?

"kill her, take her money, on condition that you dedicate yourself with its help to the service of humanity & the common good:  don't you think that thousands of good deeds will wipe out one little, insignificant transgression?"  (56)   

when does blatantly speaking the truth become insolence?

"but don't you see, man, nature must be guided & corrected, or else we should all be swamped with prejudices.  Otherwise there could never be one great man.  they talk of "duty, conscience" --i've got nothing to say against duty & conscience--but what are we to understand by them?"  (56)

when does self preservation become callous?

 "i read of how a condemned man, just before he died, said, or thought, that if he had to live on some high crag, on a ledge so small that there was no more than room for his two feet, with all about him the abyss, the ocean, eternal night, eternal solitude, eternal storm, & there he must remain, on a hand's-breadth of ground, all his life, a thousand years, through all eternity--it would be better to live so, than die within the hour?  only to live, to live!  no matter how--only to live! . . . how true!  lord, how true!  how base men are! . . . & he is worse who decries them on that account!"  (135)

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just so you know, "much of crime & punishment is meant to be a rebuttal of chernyshevsky's ideas".  chernyshevsky was a progressive radical who "rejected traditional & religious ideas & stressed the influence of environment on man, human rationality & perfectability, & the advisability of seeking one's own advantage."